Vainglorious Tomfoolery & Other Distractions









Often I keep my depression at bay with a heavy dose of silliness.

You may have noticed.

I realize that I take a hit in the respect department, but it's my life and it works and it's a whole heckuvva lot better than moping about wanting to die. This is probably why I've been enjoying playing around over at dailybooth.com. It's a veritable Logan's Run where I am the antediluvian aberration in a very young arena, but the community is so creative with their self-portraits that I find it uplifting as well as inspiring.

I could write a blog like other depressives I've come across. Sadness can in point of fact feed the muse. If I were to give in to such urges, it might sound like this:


Friday, February 27, 2009 11:49:56 AM

Blackness envelops me with it's comforting embrace.
Shirts, pants, socks all dark as night.
I paint my eyes with the color of my anger.
Die, world! Die!
I hate you all.

Grawlix, I need my meds…


Fortunately, I decided long ago that I'd rather just take a goofy picture and move on.

That's not to say that I don't struggle. Some days can be harder than others. Take the last dozen or so. The ticking has been out of control. Consequently, my productivity has been disasterous. I alluded to it the other day. However, I choose to keep upbeat as best I can. There's not really anything I can do about it, is there? Besides, as new reader Kat pointed out:


I would bet that if you looked at your Really Important goals--kids fed & taxi'd, homeschool done--you'd find you really did get a lot done this month.


She was right. I had forgotten the biggest goal I had accomplished this month: turning my sleep schedule around. I had also discounted all the little things I do each day, such as tending to the girls, feeding them, putting out their fires, etc. Funny how we do that when we have our eyes set on the prize.

Still, staying positive is often a difficult task when Depression settles in, such as today. I began the day in high hopes. This was the day my wife was going to watch the kids so I could make a heroic stab at finishing my writing goals for the month. I'd leave the house and go to a café somewhere and get busy. But there was a Discussion, and, after I was ready for the day, there was a two and a half hour errand. Finally, devoid of dinner filling my jiggly bits, I settled in to work at the local Barnes & Noble feeling not a little bit dejected.

Now I can finally dive into the picture book manuscript I've been rewriting and fix the problems I think are preventing the story from getting published. And hey, it's only 8pm! Whoohoo!

But there I go sounding negative again. Time for a another silly picture.




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Comments

Anonymous said…
LOL
Anonymous said…
Thanks for a laugh today - I tend to read depression blogs which do lack laughs. Your poem is really funny also! Sometimes the best thing we can do is lighten up, watch that sitcom, or goof around.
Cheers, Ellen
D.R. Cootey said…
Yay! Somebody liked my poetry! LOL

Bless their hearts, many of those other depression blogs can get pretty bleak. Some find their way here, but wander away because I'm too upbeat. They tend to pool together in black swirling eddies of sadness.

Glad you haven't wandered away. Your comment made my day.

~Douglas
Anonymous said…
It's healthy to laugh at ourselves, especially when sadness fills one from head to toe. My troubles are different from yours , but still , sometimes they overwhelm me. My boys have all grown up, there is no pitter patter of feet resounding through my home anymore. Just lots of wonderful memories echoing about. Enjoy your children , savor every moment , laugh at life's ups and downs. Time will fly by, and there will plenty of hours to draw and write in the future. For now, enjoy the few creative moments you can get. Being Mr. Mom is an awesome important job. ......... mountainfaerie
sbwrites said…
Dear Douglas,
I couldn't agree more. While it may be difficult for me to laugh during a severe depressive episode, there are still lots of positive wellness activities to do to try and feel better!

Susan

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