Progress Report: My Month as an ADHD Shrubbery
Remember that experiment last month where I was supposed to be analyzing just how Multi-Irons Syndrome affected me? Yeah, me neither.
I wasn't able to post my month in review on May 30th because I was racing across I-15 that day. It seemed all of a sudden I was the guy elected to drive two of my daughters to an Irish feis in Scottsdale, Arizona. I would have enjoyed the scenery more if the trip hadn't occurred in the dark. I did get to see quite a bit of wildlife cross my headlights as I broke the sound barrier over the desert floor. (Who needs the Bonneville Salt Flats?) I saw a coyote and a whole herd of jackrabbits. I even saw the Milky Way, which I was relieved to find out was still there. I hadn't seen it in quite some time. Word must have been out, though, that I was coming. I had the singular experience of watching the gas go up from station to station from Utah into Nevada and back down into Arizona. Fortunately, I rest assured that my carbon footprint was still smaller than either Al Gore's or Barack Obama's. Besides, I fertilized the desert flora along the way, something I bet neither of those gents can claim. Actually, I probably shouldn't have claimed that either.
The sudden road trip was a good wild card to be played on me. As I detailed in "My First Steps at Managing Multi-Irons Syndrome", like many people with ADHD I go through a cycle every few years of pulling excess irons out of the fire in an effort to gain some sort of control over my time and my life. Prune. Collect. Prune. Collect. I've been doing it all of my adult life. This time after I pruned I set out to complete just two goals — the two most important at the time — and I watched and waited to see just how ADHD affected me. Could I do it? Could I stay focused? Would I be able to concentrate only on two goals? Nothing tested that more than a sudden road trip thrown at me at the end of the busy month.
The good news is that yes, I could do it. I put my shoulder to the wheel and pushed along, taking note of all the distractions that made the journey difficult. Although I needed a week to get my bearings again after returning from the trip, I didn't head off in a new direction as I have done in the past, but instead dove right back into the remaining goal. I will comment on all those difficulties in the next article which I am still writing. I aim to publish it later today.
The first goal I had set for myself was to finish the first draft of my picture/chapter book "Benjamin Fudge and the Vegetable Grudge". This I accomplished before the road trip. What a great feeling of accomplishment to finish another children's book. I know that I was only able to do it because I had organized my schedule and made it a priority.
The other goal was to "pour my attention" into the duihope.org project. I didn't have as much progress in that as I'd have liked, but by no fault of my own. The software I needed to work on the job didn't arrive until after I was back from Arizona, which is the way these things usually go. Still, I did work on the project, so that, too, was a success.
Just prior to squeezing a spontaneous road trip into my schedule I had rediscovered Jeff Smith of Cartoon Books. I had been a fan of his graphic novel, "Bone"
, for years, but stopped following him when I stopped buying comics over ten years ago. Jeff had an exhibit of his work up at his old alma mater in Ohio and there was an online interview that really opened my eyes.
All these years I felt Jeff sprung up out of the American comic landscape overnight like a tall, original, and polished sequoia. Instead, I learned his work was heavily influenced in style by "Pogo"
, a favorite series of his youth, and that when I had just begun a comic strip at college he had completed a four year run doing a comic strip at college. He then reworked those characters and proceeded to bring them to life in comic book form for thirteen years. Simply amazing. How did he prevent himself from wandering off and doing something new out of boredom? How did he find interest in the work instead of interest from outside of the work?
As I struggled with my two simple goals I was quite humbled by his accomplishments. When he was finished, the story of "Bone" was told in over 1300 pages – pencilled, inked, and published in 21 page installments. Jeff became a giant through hard work and perseverance; he is amazing to me. MIS is only one of my obstacles. I need to master my ADHD if I want to achieve anything on my list of goals. Otherwise, I'll be shuffling from project to project until the day I die, living my life as some sort of shrub eking out an existence in the shadow of giants.
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The sudden road trip was a good wild card to be played on me. As I detailed in "My First Steps at Managing Multi-Irons Syndrome", like many people with ADHD I go through a cycle every few years of pulling excess irons out of the fire in an effort to gain some sort of control over my time and my life. Prune. Collect. Prune. Collect. I've been doing it all of my adult life. This time after I pruned I set out to complete just two goals — the two most important at the time — and I watched and waited to see just how ADHD affected me. Could I do it? Could I stay focused? Would I be able to concentrate only on two goals? Nothing tested that more than a sudden road trip thrown at me at the end of the busy month.
The good news is that yes, I could do it. I put my shoulder to the wheel and pushed along, taking note of all the distractions that made the journey difficult. Although I needed a week to get my bearings again after returning from the trip, I didn't head off in a new direction as I have done in the past, but instead dove right back into the remaining goal. I will comment on all those difficulties in the next article which I am still writing. I aim to publish it later today.
The first goal I had set for myself was to finish the first draft of my picture/chapter book "Benjamin Fudge and the Vegetable Grudge". This I accomplished before the road trip. What a great feeling of accomplishment to finish another children's book. I know that I was only able to do it because I had organized my schedule and made it a priority.
The other goal was to "pour my attention" into the duihope.org project. I didn't have as much progress in that as I'd have liked, but by no fault of my own. The software I needed to work on the job didn't arrive until after I was back from Arizona, which is the way these things usually go. Still, I did work on the project, so that, too, was a success.
Just prior to squeezing a spontaneous road trip into my schedule I had rediscovered Jeff Smith of Cartoon Books. I had been a fan of his graphic novel, "Bone"
All these years I felt Jeff sprung up out of the American comic landscape overnight like a tall, original, and polished sequoia. Instead, I learned his work was heavily influenced in style by "Pogo"
As I struggled with my two simple goals I was quite humbled by his accomplishments. When he was finished, the story of "Bone" was told in over 1300 pages – pencilled, inked, and published in 21 page installments. Jeff became a giant through hard work and perseverance; he is amazing to me. MIS is only one of my obstacles. I need to master my ADHD if I want to achieve anything on my list of goals. Otherwise, I'll be shuffling from project to project until the day I die, living my life as some sort of shrub eking out an existence in the shadow of giants.
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Comments
Oh, man, can I ever relate to that statement. Good luck with your struggle, Douglas. Reading about yours provides inspiration for mine.
Remember there IS someone out here.
ThickTigerLady ~ I've really enjoyed your comments over the past few weeks. I'm sorry I've been so busy and haven't responded to any of them. I usually keep on top of comments, but this past month has been an exception.
One goal of my blog is to show others that we can overcome these quirks and be productive and happy — if not by my example, then by the example of the people who post comments. This is because, as you say, knowing something is not the same thing as doing it. Sometimes we need the encouragement of others to get some wind under our sails.
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Good ideas/comments and I like your idea plan of the one medication at a time...Hey, if you're checking the site, I'm trying to get in touch with your brother Matt. I'm heading through Utah in a couple of days and I would be remiss not to look y'all up. You can contact me through naieta@yahoo.com
Nick Aieta
formerly of, Sandwich, MA
As I struggled with my two simple goals I was quite humbled by his accomplishments. "
I don't know how it worked for Jeff, but for me, I have been forced to focus out of necessity. In order to complete my Master's, teach full-time in a new job, settle into a new house, raise two kids, and take care of my husband with his illness (all of which seem like full-time jobs), I haven't been able to afford the luxury of distraction (much). Now that I have tenure in the new job, the degree completed, the boxes unpacked, and a routine somewhat established for the summer, I feel like perhaps I can breathe again.
Sorry I've been more of a lurker in the past few months. I still read the RSS feed, but haven't made enough time to respond. It has seemed a bit like you haven't had time for a comment dialog anyway.
Hope life is treating you well.
Claire
Actually, I'm disappointed. If the anonymous commenter had left out the f-bombs I could have left his comment for all to enjoy. As per the rules of this forum, stated clearly above the comment field for people making comments, profanity and hate speech will get your comment deleted.
Ledger's upcoming performance in Batman the Dark Knight will only make the waste of his life even more tragic. Drug abuse cannot be excused no matter how much we may like the person doing it. I stand by my earlier comments on the subject.
~Douglas
Anonymous ~ Sorry for the VERY late reply. I forgot to check back on this column for comments and that should be your first clue that I truly do have ADHD. I write about it all the time. Check this link: ADHD
I was diagnosed as hyperkinetic as a kid at 3 weeks old, according to my mother. I was on ritalin from 1st or 2nd grade all through high school (I graduated in 1984). ADHD was a term that cam in during the 80's. I remember researching hyperkinesis for fun (yes, I've always been a bit of a geek) in '85 when I was attending MassArt and learning that ADD and ADHD were the new terms of choice. Thank Heavens I dodged the "Minimal Brain Dysfunction" label. Geez, what sadist came up with that term?
Nick ~ Nice to hear from you. Matt is not online. I think. Or he is. It depends. I never know for sure. He and I don't see a lot of each other anymore. I'll pass your email address to my Mum and ask her to forward your message along.
Claire ~ Thanks for popping by. I appreciate you taking time out of your busy schedule to stay in contact. Yes, the summer has been crazy. I'm looking forward to settling back into a regular schedule now that the girls are back in school.
I see you are very active on Facebook. I prefer Twitter for my socnet, Flickr for my photos. Haven't been sucked into FB too much. ;)
Life is treating me well, and I'm glad to hear you have made your goals. Well done!
Annie & Brony ~ Thanks!
Phew! That was a lot of catching up to do. One of those things I planned on getting back to but never seemed to remember. Thanks for all your fantastic comments.
~Douglas