Wednesday, May 09, 2012

Thinking Deeply Again

My attention span is like a freely spinning frisbee.

The Goblin Brownie is in happy Netflix Land in the other room, and in a few moments the Leprechaun & Elf will be home. My time alone will be over. I've been rethinking how I spend my time lately and wishing I had tighter control of it. Of course, my brain's a freely spinning frisbee heading to parts unknown, but perhaps with a bit of effort I can rein it in and have more to show for my day—other than errands and work.

I need to live with greater purpose. I'm not as distracted as I am unfocused at the moment. I have goals, but I have to admit that my depression and this divorce have buried much of the enthusiasm I usually have for life. I'm surviving, but I'm not tackling my goals with passion, determination & focus. I want to change that.

So today I will write another 1000 words and blog and cook dinner and wash laundry and pick up the house and exercise with the kids and do basically everything. Because I have to, and because I can. Then maybe I can start to see a light at the end of the tunnel. Because sitting here feeling blah isn't helping me get anything done. And getting things done is how I determine whether I have any value or not.


Update: I forgot that the Brownie dislikes being called the Goblin. I upgraded her name only recently at her request. Please don't tell her I slipped up. Shhhh!